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Barbie would have to walk on all fours if she were a real person. Perhaps just like Barbies, if a mannequin were real, they too might struggle to walk and just live in general. Shops, however, need to sell clothes, and being unattainably youthful and slender is how they go about this. Except for one shop, which has broken the mould. The only thing is, not everyone's convinced this mannequin, pictured in the menswear department, is even meant to be there. The picture of the mannequin with the XXL waistline was uploaded to Reddit where it confused people as much as it delighted them. Firstly, there was debate aplenty on what the mannequin was wearing. Are those Man Capris? Cropped trousers? Long shorts?

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It turns out that the type of girl at home in a Halfpenny gown is not the sort who’s been planning her wedding since the year dot – she’s had much better things to do – so I felt immediately comfortable fixing an appointment to meet Kate and her lovely team. I had the place to myself, and the way the shop has been designed makes it feel like hanging out in a friend’s bedroom – albeit a supremely cool, wealthy friend with a thing for white. Her colleagues Alexia and Kerry had got to work like a SWAT team, knowing exactly which shapes and sizes to try, and cinching me into a waist-whittling bralette. I felt a bit like a living doll as, chatting away cheerfully and asking about my wedding, they popped elegant maxi skirts, silky slips and embellished belts over and around me. Their speed was incredible, and before I knew it I was in front of a mirror, every inch the bride and – more importantly – every inch myself. Kate was expert at working out the ingredients for my dream outfit (“It’s not just what you’re saying, it’s what you’re not saying.” She noted sagely as I ummed and ahhed over a dress that wasn’t The One) and before half an hour was up, I’d found my perfect style. Ok, actually I found at least three I’d be more than happy to say ‘I do’ to! The best thing about the day – apart from the swoony clothes – was the lack of a hard sell. I never once felt pressured to hand over a (half)penny, the emphasis was very much on try, and try again.

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